He had been a disaster… feeling something his whole life knowing that something more waited for him… not just the feeling of love.. as human love has been known to be conditional. He was waiting for this place that love was only the beginning… he could feel it within him that this never ending place was a place of not just beyond love feelings.. but even more something magical.. He tried to give it and receive it and kept finding that those he encountered well they just were ok with a settle feeling… mistakingly telling him that he was there soul mate… a soul mate… a soul mate to most well a majority is that which is what can answer to some of the things that most would believe them to be.. just a great feeling of conditional human love. Never understanding that it was only a beginning and should never be settled for. Not just a moment or two here and there. Then this place where you just say ok… this is enough… this is who I am.. and I have things that I have not figured out yet. This is an empty feeling.. as for him… he kept wondering what he did wrong.. then the blame went elsewhere. On that which he kept trying to give himself too. He would do the most beautiful wonderful things.. yet it just seemed to go un-noticed. With each moment that he placed himself into to have someone share it with the more it seemed to be just another moment that would pass that he would share by himself.
It dawned on him that maybe he should try and communicate that he was in those moments.. later to find that which he shared these moments with.. Would really try and create it.. not by looking within themselves.. but by the communication that was given. It was a passing thing.. as he felt that this could fulfill him in some way. Yet after a while this too came to be something that was a moment lost in sharing. He then found something within this place inside a passion.. a deep lasting passion that he could actually give himself butterflies.. those butterflies unfortunately when given… would allow those who were present to dance in them and enjoy them while they where given… but again… the moment was lost.. he couldn’t imagine why.. he felt that he was cursed… no one to understand.. no one to embrace.. His heart kept giving this for what could only be described as lifetimes… He knew that inside of him lived this magical kingdom that he could embrace and feel a love deeper than anyone ever known… No one can fathom this.. not really it is his alone to carry.
As time has passed he finds himself more and more in love with this place in him.. It came to a head one early summer… A butterfly of the butterflies entered into his life and explained things in such bits and pieces that his belief was changed… no more would he continue to try and understand something that didn’t make sense.. he needed it to make sense.. So he gave it some understanding.. and removed all thought and saw the bliss that can come when you don’t let emotions of frustration control you. Denial of what was sought after coming into you. He felt a new feeling.. this feeling could only be described as the heartbeat of beyond love that he was seeking.. at first he felt he was losing his mind… which truly he did… he needed to lose this to realize that what he had in him was something more than what even he himself couldn’t see. The deeper he sank into this place the more meaningful he felt he was becoming to himself.. a love for himself blossomed…
The butterflies not only got stronger but became so strong it was as though he was invincible to anything that could be less than anything but this magical place that was within him.. Feeling as though he could teach this.. he decided that the butterfly was only there to teach him to fly… he kept doing things… and kept trying to reach into others and show them this very thing.. he failed… miserably… no one got it.. No lights turned on… no one embraced it.. and then he really felt broken.. broken as to not recover… something magical did happen from this though.. his heart grew.. he no longer realized he had to love himself… cause remember love is conditional… This was only hindering him from becoming the man he was supposed to be all along.. without these conditions.. without these barriers he then learned he was not from this world.. where ever he was from he came with something that was deeper than love.. a deeper feeling of passion.. he was more.. more because more became solitude and prosperity not for things that make you rich but make you whole. He story is still on going… He does realize one thing though. The magical moments that happen you must be there at that moment or you will totally be without. This new found place is a perfect place to be.
Life is that magic that happens when you are not paying attention to the past or future. Imagine what that kiss must be like… Imagine what that touch must feel like.. Imagine what it is to be totally there with this place within you! Now imagine sharing it with another. He wonders.. not just if this is possible but knowing that it is possible. It is the place that true supernatural events take place. Truly make yourself present.. Go inside your body and pay attention to the current moment. You will be surprised at your surroundings when you are that much awake. To be continued….