Mason, Ohio Connect@RelationshipReinvented.com (513) 399-7718

Im Marrying a Cheater!!!

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As a Child I dreamed of this Connection, a love no other seemed to believe in, I would daydream about a connection so deep that you could feel physical manifestations of the other person, I dreamed and dreamed and when I spoke of this great love i was shot down,”your living in a fantasy world”. “there is no such thing, its only in dreams”. So that’s where I kept it, in my dreams,,,,,, I married for 13 years, it was a “normal” marriage, I divorced dated, and then 2 years of self discovery ended me up in a new city with a brand new start and a fresh outlook on life, and then,,,,,, it all started.

I met him, when I saw him, my heart knew something was different, my soul awakened, my eyes were gazing upon the most beautiful man I have ever seen. We spoke and his voice consumed me, his written words were poetry to my ears. The first time my eyes saw him My heart stopped beating for seconds, I could not breathe, Ill nervier forget the fist sight, he was standing/leaning against the back of his car at a place we had agreed to meet at, he wore business attire which He wore so sexy, he was certainly easy on the eyes, I Immediately felt unworthy, I felt this beautiful man could not be here to meet me, but he was and I was falling all over myself. We talked to get to know one another, and time stood still.

 

Time after time he would call the numbers still are etched in my soul when they would show up on the caller Id, my heart raced, my palms would sweat. He had done something to me, we would make plans to meet, always at my place and I would get so excited, I would make sure to be home earlier to shower and prepare myself for THIS meet may be “the one” because every time we met there was ALOT of kissing and making out, and oh my when we kissed it lasted for hours,and well as ironic as it was HE would not “put out”. He never left me unsatisfied, the passion so strong so amazing so deep, however it seems I was on a “mission”.

 

Let me go back for a second and describe a kiss, a kiss I have written about, and he has written about, a kiss so deep, a kiss that awakened that ‘DREAM” I had kept inside of me, I saw inside of his soul, I saw him and I knew he could see me, I knew he he could see “ME”. That scared the shit out of me, why wouldn’t it, I had lived a very messed up life, I had a lot of skeletons in my closet and this fine specimen of a man had the key to the damn door! Let me explain how that feel for those of you who dont know,,,,Its like a serial killer who had a ton of “evidence” in his house and the police were knocking on the door,,,, That kiss made my heart do flips, made my stomach turn in excitement and fear combined. When he left that day I was glad he was gone but never wanted him to leave.

 

The visits became less and less and my “mission” was not complete,,,, and then i began to put together pieces like a puzzle in my mind. He had asked me not to call him as it was a business phone and he got “charged” for calls. He only ever contacted me during the day “business hours”, we only ever met during the day, and his e mails were mostly his writings, writings of sexual nature, fantasies he had in his head, stories of passion and lust and love at first I felt as if he had just copied and pasted them but later I knew they were his writings. I sat in a sinking feeling,,,, he MUST be married.

 

He called for a “visit” and what some would call a “booty call” but i wasn’t getting any “booty”, but THIS was the visit I was going to complete my “mission”, This man who had such a great impact on my soul, I knew was “shady” I know was lying, I had to put my DREAM, back inside of myself, lock it back up and just complete my mission,,,,,, always wondering WHY he would not go all of the way with me? Was i not good enough? Was I not sexy enough? Was I not worthy? Did he have a disease? Did he promise himself he would “play around” but never really go all of the way out of respect for his wife IF he had one? WHY???  What was the problem,,,, I asked him in an e mail, Are you HIV Positive? he laughed and said no im not, I have a clean bill of health,,, so the mission was reinstated,,,, and the visit came and through some really tough persuasion HE gave in to my “persuasion” and mission accomplished. When he was about to leave I looked into his eyes, something was different, something had changed in him, he left and I knew at that moment I would not be hearing back from him. I went on with my life so I thought, there were times I missed him, when the phone rang I would hope, I checked my e mail,, nothing, The only breakdown I had was one fall day,,September 26th 2005,

 

I had confronted him in e mail about his lies,days before, explaining to him what i saw,,, all the signs of a married man,,,,his response was another “fantasy” written out, he avoided my comments and my questions, he was exposed so divert my attention he “thought” he would grab my attention with another writing, I was livid, i was angry, I was hurt and I drove, I drove out to a place very special to me, a Big deck over a lake in a State park, a Deck my Grandpa and my Father had a part in building as a “Community service” project. I went out there often, and although it had been rebuilt a couple of times since then I still feel the craftsmanship my Grandfather put into everything he did. I got there, the wind was chilly, it was almost dark, I listened to the squirrels run around in the leaves, I saw a rabbit, I was a fish jump in the water and I began to cry, I began to scream out loud,,,, WHY ARE YOU LYING TO ME? WHY ARE YOU SO DIFFERENT? WHY CANT I STOP FEELING YOU?? WHO ARE YOU AND WHY DID YOU COME INTO MY LIFE? I HAVE HAD ENOUGH HURT I DONT NEED YOURS!!! IF YOU CAN FEEL ME STOP LYING TO ME AND COME TO ME,,, EXPLAIN THIS FEELING I HAVE EXPLAIN WHY I CAN SEE INSIDE OF YOU!!!  COME BACK TO ME SO WE CAN FIGURE THIS OUT,,,,,  CAN YOU HEAR ME,,,,, I screamed until my throat hurt and I felt as if my tears would flood the lake, I watched as they hit the water down below and I felt as if I was fighting a losing battle, The Universe had played a very bad trick on me.

 

From that moment on everything with his was a game to me, I just knew he was different, the way he touched me, the way he spoke to me, they way he looked at me, the way we connected.

I had to let it go, I had to put this awakening feeling back inside of me, and I did, and i eventually went on with my life and I was right that was the last time I saw him, The time I was able to “complete mission”.The e mails got fewer and fewer. I did not need all that in my life, I met someone else and got engaged, and then out of nowhere a YEAR later a message,,,,A simple how are you doing message and then come everything flooding inside of me,,,HOWEVER  attached with those feelings were hurt and doubt, and A lot of doubt inside of me,,, wait if I can still have “these” kinds of feelings for someone else how could I marry someone? I was a mess inside and it was really all his fault!! Why did he come back into my life?

 

For months we met and talked and time stood still, but this was different as I was on a path of self destruction, it was me against everyone who had ever hurt me, and I grew into something just as bad as I felt he was, He was trying to stand in his truth, trying I say because he was not but I was getting answers, and I loved being in his presence It awakened me further, and the darkness got deeper as I knew he could see me so I had to find deeper places to hide it. I found out that my suspicions were warranted,he was married, however he had not lived with his wife for years, but had lived with someone else for nearly 9 years, so he had a wife AND a live in girlfriend, funny thing though he was still sleeping with his wife,and was lying to her and telling her he loved her and she had hung on for him all those years, all the while living another life with someone else,, and me well I was only one of MANY, he had on the side of his wife and live in girlfriend,in my eyes at that time he was a gorgeous, sexy, womanizing player! But I loved him, however so did many others, I found out he was sending them all the same “fantasies” all the same deep writings, all the ‘lines” only 1 thing was different,,, He would not be intimate with me in entirety. He was living out fantasy in each and every  woman he was with looking for different pieces of his puzzle, looking for something different in each one, he was looking for “himself”. He was hurting so many, and the big picture was the hurt he was doing to himself,,,

I watched him go through a change so deep, I watched as he confessed everything to me, I let him cry, I loved this man, I realized at this moment I was deep in love with him, but my mind would tell me over and over there was ALOT of women in love with this man! All I could do was be his friend, and go on with my life, so I was his friend and i stayed his friend as I watched him cry and confess and do it again to another woman and again to another one, and I watched as he witnessed me “feeling” his pain, I watched him and loved him as his wounds were deep, and his change was hard, he was lost. I knew I could never be with him really,,,Once a Cheater always a Cheater right??? We would confess our love for one another and we would in turn hurt one another.

 

I knew I could never really “be” with a man like this, I could never trust him, I cold never believe in him, again once a Cheater,,,,I married and it was a lie, I was not in love with him, I loved him, But I was not in love with him, I did it out of hurt,I just wanted to be loved and be the “only” one in someones life, and I knew I would have this from this man, I didn’t want to live a life of non trust, already we were connected though I could not deny that, however he would confess his love for me and the same night I could FEEL him with someone else. The Pain was hard to handle, it was unbearable, So perhaps marrying someone else was a way to throw that pain back at him, In turn I realize I was hurting a lot of people as well, I had become him, he just didn’t know it!

 

My Marriage was a mess, no wonder, I was in love with someone else and we communicated daily, We remained friends, as my marriage fell apart, In a night of hurt and to much alcohol I slept with my husband who I was already estranged from, and we conceived,,, I met with my friend and he is the one who told me i was pregnant he could see it in me. It was true, So I was living a lie with a man who I was about to have a child with, and he was still sleeping with others, still lying to his wife, and his live in girlfriend. At one point he had told me to just “come on” just come and be with him and he would raise my child as his own and we would just be in love,,, I thought about it over and over and after an argument with my husband I left and went to him, when i got to his home before I got to the door, I saw in the window and he was in an embrace with his girlfriend and they kissed, i never knocked i went him to my husband, it was what it was, we loved one another deeply but the hurt was to much, but I TRUSTED my husband and I needed that !

 

My friend and I barely spoke during my pregnancy we e mailed a bit and spoke on messenger a bit, but the communication was no where near as before,, He sent my son a gift in the mail and

we just remained friends,,,and just as fast as communication diminished it picked backup again, only this time it was a bit different he was different and I could see something about to happen, I wasn’t sure what. We met and we were “together” only this time beautiful and it was life changing and I knew he was someone I could never be without even if not physically, we were spiritually connected, we loved one another and it was evident.

 

 

We got closer and closer and I knew he was still lying and seeing others, this player was good, I had dealt with a “couple” of the women he hurt and they told me the same stories, “he said that to me too, yes he told me that too!”  uggg this man was toxic!!  and then,,,His mother was found very ill, and I watched him as he lost his mother, it was a very painful time for him, I just remained his friend, I went to the service, sat in the very back row, I just wanted him to know  I was there for him, I didn’t stick around, I left directly after. I saw him the next week and I saw something in him I had not seen before, It was different ! He cried to me, he broke down and the next few months were hell. i watched him die, I watched him split, I watched him fight and struggle, he was honest with his girlfriend who had since moved out, he actually told her he was deeply in love with me and he was direct.

 

He then went through something really really amazingly painful but so beautiful! He was honest with his wife and he started the process of divorce, my husband had long since moved out and finally just simply asked me “why aren’t you with him?” Did I mention my ex husband is a great man? SO we did it we made a go of it but did I trust him?? HELL NO!  when he stated he was in a meeting I requested a “picture” of this said meeting and he always accommodated and he understood!  What we had not addressed was the skeletons I had in my closet!  at this point he was standing COMPLETELY in his truth,he was COMPLETELY honest with HIMSELF and with me about every aspect of his past and his life.

 

We lived together until MY skeletons began to come out and why would he stay with me after all he had been though why would he stay with me he was honest with me he deserved my honesty and i never gave it to him, we separated and he forgave me and we reconnected and it happened again months later and again he forgave me and we reconnected and again, it happened again and he left me, this time for good, I saw it in him, he tried to connect with someone else as did I, I went through the same pain he went through I had to find myself, I had to fall in love with MYSELF, I had to go not my pain.

 

Now as we are both in our truth from this 9 year Journey,, we have been back out to that deck together numerous times, He proposed to me on that deck, standing in the very same place I was screaming for him at, tears fell from both of our eyes in the same water. I am in love with this amazing man and I get to spend the rest of my life with him, We share EVERYTHING we hide nothing from one another, we share a cell phone, we share emails, we share face books, we are together nearly always and when we are not, those very same butterflies I felt in 2005, i feel today when he calls from the store, when he sends me a message from Face book when im sitting right next to him.

 

I trust this man with everything i have in me, I trust him in every aspect! I trust he will never lie to me, I trust I am and always will be his one and only, I trust everything he Says to me. I believe in him, I believe in the Business we have created out of our story and out of what the universe has asked us to do, I believe in myself, I believe our running and chasing was a lesson and our experiences have already changed lives.

 

I sit in awe of this AMAZINGLY gorgeous man everyday of my life, I watch him walk and I smile I watch him type on the computer and I feel lucky, I watched him sleep just last night and I cried, He really is a genuine person, he’s gorgeous, he’s incredibly sexy, he’s honest, he’s true, he’s loving, he’s romantic, he’s passionate,hes kind, he’s generous, hes giving, he provides for us, he’s a wonderful father, he’s compassionate,and he loves me unconditionally and I love him unconditionally, I love him for what he’s been through, what we have been through, and the universe is now allowing us to teach from it.  The honeymoon stage is never ending, inside of me I still have those “forever” butterflies. The dream inside of me is awake and WE ARE LIVING IT! Relationship Reinvented was born from this connection.

 

The old Quote “Once a cheater always a cheater”  could be true, My cheater, CHEATED CHEATING do you understand that????,By going inside of the root of WHY he was choosing those actions, WHY he was hurting people. He went INSIDE, he in a sense took his own life,HE CHEATED CHEATING! and I have this wonderful man in my life, he is still a cheater, he cheated his pain out of staying alive, he cheated his story out of Defining him, He cheated everyone who knows him out of being able to say, “hes still the same old guy” “believe me he’s still lying and cheating”, anyone who knows him now and knows him then is no longer able to say that because they can see it in him! They can see by his actions and his energy that part of him no longer exists. He has cheated that quote out of being true!!   I was on that deck on September 26th or 2005 screaming for him,,,, and I will be back on that deck September 26th of this year Marrying this Cheater and I am the Luckiest Woman in the World!

I Love You Clark Kent

Love Lois

 

26 Comments on “Im Marrying a Cheater!!!

  1. A wonderful post.. I would say you are both quite lucky and fortunate to have each others love to carry you through and be who you are. Thank you for sharing your heart and inspiration… 🙂 Joe

    • My friend, so many out there… never give the truth a chance.. for the truth changes us all… We just have to see it through the lies for the truth to be born.. there is a great love inside the truth waiting for it to be discovered.. to be found out… But what if while listening to the voice in the head why it is a great idea to lie.. we miss what the truth wants us to birth within? Love deeply, as I have found the depth of love within myself that always was seeking this birth…

      Clark

    • Awe thank you my friend… how do we know what we are seeking if our minds are activated to the story we tell ourselves! Love deeply, Clark

  2. Beautiful post Louis,when I was reading this post I was seeing my self in there n I totally felt that how it feels..u r an inspiration to me..thank u so much for this beautiful post!!
    Love and blessings
    Priya

    • Thank you my friend… the mess is always beautiful, especially when it is filled with love and compassionate listening… Cheating isn’t a choice it is a symptom of something missing… and even more pain and suffering in all forms of abandonment! Thank you so much for your response.

      Lois

  3. My God!!! beautiful sad story!! If you were able to go through all that and still be together in the end..truly it is a divine union. Wow how did your family react to this back and forth. I know for a fact they would never accept him for all the hurt he has caused me and believe he will cause me in the future. This is they only story i have seem where twins have actually lived the BS and turned out to be fine. Wishing you guys much luck and YES!! keep burning that flame. Congratulations on your engagement! I will follow this blog forever…and hope to share it with him one day when it comes true for us. As for now alluta continua–the struggle continues.

    Much love and light

    M

    • Thank You so much for your kind words, We have lived through this and so much more as the pain he endured through my unconsciousness was just as brutal, when He awoke I went to sleep, I became the cheater, here he was standing in his complete and honest truth and he had become conscious and I betrayed him, not once but numerous times. Now we are conscious together we both stand in truth and share a wonderful life, our families are so loving and accepting, my ex husband is a very big part of our life and such a wonderful friend, our children are excited and they watch us both stand our truth and that is the lesson,,, always stand in your truth never hide anything from one another, we share every aspect of our lives together, we share 1 cell phone, face books, e mails all shared nothing hidden ever and its wonderful and loving and peaceful…

  4. You two never cease to impress me. <3 Beautiful story and beautiful union you have!

  5. I ADMIRE YOU BOTH, YOU HAVE THE STRENGHT, AND THE UNCONDITIONAL LOVE IT TOOK TO BE HERE TOGETHER TODAY.

  6. Dear Lois & Clark, thank you so much for posting this! It seems our story! 😉
    I am wondering Lois, what do you mean by “When he woke up I was the one cheating?”

    • To answer your question: He woke up from his destructive behavior, he stood completely in his truth, he was honest with me and gave his all to me, he had nothing hidden and he chose me to give himself to, and in return I betrayed him, I was dishonest with him, i began to hide secrets, see other men, lie to him, It was quite a vicious cycle,in the end before the true beginning we separated and we both tried giving ourselves to another,, however our connection is as an industrial magnet, we feel one another even when we are not in physical presence. I was giving my honesty to someone and he accepted it, however he was not the one I wanted or needed to accept it, he was not my twin and the vibrational pull just was to strong, I felt him always I was really never without him, I was without myself, we can see inside one another and when we both were in the same place at the same time and we could see one another,nothing else existed, it was just us and from that day forward we continue to honor our connection by remaining in our truths always, there is nothing we dont know about one another, we do everything together, we share everything and its freeing and cleansing and so very peaceful, passionate and fulfilling.

      • Thank you very much for sharing these personal stuff! I’m curious though… Clark, what made you finaly choose her? What made you see that these others were not the one you love! And Lois, what made you step out of the dishonesty to choose him! What triggered you? I mean, the magnetic field has always been there, so what made that the both of you finaly said YES to eachtoher? Do you remember? Im asking cause, We have the same story almost (although I live celebate) and our merge is almost there, physically yes, working together yes, loving eachother yes, but the rest of the world cannot know and he’s telling me over and over, we’re just friends.

        • To answer your question, what made me step out of my dishonesty and choose him, was losing him, here was a man I had called to, a man who could see me, who I really was and he loved me unconditionally and he chose me, and losing that was devastating, he removed me from his life and I could feel him. I knew without doubt he would never even think of being with me in the physical world if I was not standing in my truth, dont get me wrong I didn’t chose to stand in my truth for him, I stood in all my truth for me, he could see that and here we are.
          Lois

  7. What happened to me was the more I had to be in the truth the more I could see what the truth really was.. I was seeking a love that was of my dreams.. When I was with all of those that found me I loved them deeply yet all it was to them was just that regular something in them was shut off to me, It was like I wasn’t allowed to feel them completely… I am not sure why, yet I knew that I could be with someone I could truly feel, I could truly hear inside of myself them deep within me and they would feel the same! When we met I didn’t know this was her, I knew something was different and something in me felt naked to her, but I was so in my mind about the connection I knew existed, I ignored that I had found what I was looking for all along. The mind is a very powerful energy.. It does the most amazing things to you both beautifully and destructively. As I started to feel her to include this darn song that played in my head and when she got pregnant, other knowings as a gift came to me, Clairaudience, clairvoyance, etc… I could hear the music she was playing, I could feel the pain when she cried, I could feel her smile, I could feel her laugh, I could feel the most incredible things inside without her near me and they became stronger in our presence to each other… I could feel the pain when she was with another.. I soon could feel the dishonest behavior, I also heard the messages of how what energy was to come back to me in karma… when I found out the truth of her deceptions on my own, I removed her from me.. I left her and moved on with another that I wanted to have this connection with.. Unfortunately it doesn’t work that way. When someone vibrationally enters you and resonates you to see yourself in the layers of conditions you were to make them unconditional this is never removed and the truth of the human connection is birthed in you to what we all are here to experience. This into the truth was the way this worked, it was beyond the mind.. the passion that I was always seeking was home.. I knew in my knowing that the honeymoon phase of a connection is something you can have forever, it didn’t require nothing the mind could give us.. It gave us something greater.. What if we have had connection all wrong all along.. what if the way you can feel in vibration that fears are removed in being, it opens the doors to both birth and death and the connection that was before you got here and after you leave found you in between that existence. That is what we found in each other… It was what it made me find beyond myself to be myself! I am.. was born.. after almost 40 years.. do you see the total picture in truth. I have no fears of saying what I was.. I have no vested being in what I have done to anyone to include myself. I have compassionate forgiveness for the humbling existence I was seeking to find in this truth. I don’t seek approval for being.. I am in being, connected to the truth in connection in being.. I am My Lois as much as My Lois is Clark..

    Love deeply,
    Clark

    • In tears of joy for you guys and a little sad because I think him and me still have a long way to go then….I think you both are very brave. I know it can be very tough when the one you love, runs into others…incredible how you two managed these feelings. Thank you again for sharing. I still got some work to do I guess…. x

      • We are here to help you if you would like, we would love to give you a free 30 min coaching session via Skype or phone to help you along in your journey and get some more personal insight!

  8. PS I think this sentence “I don’t seek approval for being.. I am in being” is the most challenging of all for many of us…at least for me. You moved me, thanks!

  9. Thank you so much for this. You managed to overcome the barriers.

    The biggest challenge to my twin flame relationship is that after all that I have been through, all the hurt and pain he has given me, it is difficult to ever believe he will ever change. I tried so much throughout one year, of going back and forth, never being able to let him go because I love him, to bring peace and love into it, but he just hurt me more and more. I was left a devastation. I felt like my energy was being taken away from me. I walked away then months later he called, but after 5 minutes, he was back to his usual self and I was hurt so much that I still cry today when I think of that conversation.

    I so much wish he could be the man I have ‘seen’ and ‘know’. But it seems like he could never change. Sometimes I think I must have been delusional to think he ever could and I have paid the price for believing in something that my intuition tells me true, but in reality has been something quite different and damaging.

    That man is clever. He knows I love him and each time I have never been able to resist because of the pull…then he gets a knife out and hurts me straight after he does something loving, so I am left in a state of fear of what he will do next. He has no idea of the trauma I have been in. When I have tried to talk he shuts me down and blames me for everything even though all I do is try to be gentle and kind.

    OK, he has a history of being abused to a high degree, both by his mother and father, he has never been able to leave home because he is close to his mother, who he protects from his father who beats and cheats on her. He is one of many many children. He can’t say anything to rock the boat at home. They are a very wealthy family. Father beats him and rules family by fear. He has no voice. The only relationships he has are very casual. He hates woman, has no respect for them, but can’t go anywhere without being surrounded by them. He hurts himself, has no been able to hold a job. He tried to do a job but became violently ill because he was away from his mother. He is heavily controlled by his family like an automaton and told me he does not know who he is. He said his father has no heart. He is similar, he causes pain and does not care. He told me he can be as bad as he wants because nothing will ever happen to him.

    You can sense I am fed up with it all.

    But there is any reason to dump all of this onto me? Then walk away…

    He is right, nothing ever happens to him. His family have arranged a whole series of women he can date then marry, so he has it all on a plate. He is beautiful, intelligent, charming and talented and told me he can pick up any woman he wants from the street.

    So the reason your story helps me is because I can see that people can change. For me, I have lost all faith in my twin completely. All it takes is kind words, not harsh words, whatever background one is from. There is no excuse to hurt me any more.

    I have prayed so much for all this to change, because despite what you are reading now, there was a strong love bond between us which I know is true, but the love is not enough in a world mired with evil having a laugh at us.

    The other day when I was having osteopathic treatment for my neck I saw an image of us being separated. First we were holding each other, then we moved away. Can you believe that he was actually crying deep, deep real tears of even being a separated from me for a second? Me, the same person who he hurts?? Where is that man? Where has he gone? He was even more emotional than me.

    • My dear friend… has it occurred to you that what you may be experiencing is that which is the opposite.. To reclaim the energy he takes from you standing in your truth of what you accept and allow is what is being called to her inside yourself. Continually giving him permission to mistreat you is the same he does to himself. What if your love in him was strong enough to say no more. I can’t do it anymore. I will not allow this line to be crossed by you anymore. My inner child is activated and then abandoned by you and then by myself because I allow this. When you start holding yourself in the love you want that love you want gives you something magical.. It just takes you going inside to see it for yourself. Trust in this as it is what finally brought us together in truth! The connection lies in the being not the mind.. the mind will allow you to keep taking the punishment where in the being you ignore the message in truth. This is where the most profound energy of love is found in this connection. It is a choice to see it! We are here my friend.. We are always here! Lois and Clark

  10. Moved on from him, but it’s the trauma I am trying to deal with one year on. There has never been any resolution to it. I’ve done what I can for myself but just wish there could be comfort from outside myself to. It has taken me a long time to try and believe I can be have a good life. I used to be happy, had my own place and great job, hobbies etc. But I have just been struggling feeling very hopeless. We did not have a loving relationship. It was continual trauma. Even though we are not together, I still suffer from the trauma. It has really knocked my life, like something has been stolen from, me life, my inner happiness. I used to be somebody who would laugh daily and make others laugh, now I do not see any point of it all, because my life has just been a big mockery, with no care. No person is an island and wish I could be part of life, a life in which even if there are problems, that people take the time to heal problems between each other. I want to know what that is like, to be someone who if someone hurts, that they would actual care enough and try to sooth it later. I am fed up with having to mend it all on my own and pick up pieces of a broken life. His life was broken, mine then became like his and now I am determined to fix my life…before both the ships sink.

    Last year he once said that he was dead and had no life. I felt that he was calling out to me, I immediately went to him, then after a beautiful short time together, I was left practically dead to.

    He also said that if I died then he would too, but then he went onto cause further destruction.

    Nobody can live like that

    • This death … what is it in truth? what is this trauma in truth.. The path to ones fixing of their existence is found embedded in this.. Would you like our help? We have experienced this and it’s depth and can get you to the directness of the healing you need to have to connect to yourself to connect to your twin.. It will give you bread crumbs to the truth about what you are, in the inside place of this connection. Love deeply, Lois and Clark

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